The mercury hovered above the ninety degree mark on Sunday afternoon. The humidity was quickly approaching oppressive. It was Mother Nature’s way of showing us what she had in store in the coming months.
With summer on my mind, I got to thinking of the watermelon that’s been sitting in the fridge this last week. It was past time to slice that puppy up and enjoy the cool sweetness I knew awaited me.
I took out my favorite knife and prepared to go to work.
My favorite knife is a ten inch work horse.
I use it for everything.
Now, I’ve had that chef’s knife for almost two decades. She and I have created many a memorable meal. She’s got a good weight, with a nice balance, and her handle fits my hand well. When I’m prepping dinner or chopping veggies, she’s an extension on my arm.
But today I was careless.
After I cut the watermelon in half, I placed the knife on the table so I could set one of the halves aside. This would ensure that the half I wasn’t working on would be out of the way.
The knife fell off the table.
I stepped back to let the knife fall.
But my hand was close enough to the blade that it made contact.
I watched in slow motion as steel sliced flesh.
Time was a blur.
- Cold water.
- Rinse the cut.
- Wrap the cut.
- Apply pressure.
- Examine cut. (Probably needs stitches.)
- Call neighbor. “I need a ride to the ER.”
- Rinse cut in water again.
- Dress cut.
- Drive to ER. Sign in. Wait.
- Answer questions. Wait.
- Triage nurse. (Check blood pressure, temperature, and pulse.)
- Wait some more.
- Examination. Needle. “Ouch!”
- Wait. “Feeling no pain.”
- Clean laceration.
- Sew it up.
- Take pictures of cool stitches..
- Here’s your bill. Off you go.
- Home.
Waiting for the shot they gave me to make my finger go numb.
Listening to the kid in the next stall brag about his sprained ankle.
I really want to thank the triage nurse for informing me that ACME has “Pre-Cut” watermelon for $4.99 lb. I thought that was very considerate of her.
And in case you’re wondering, the watermelon was fine. No, really. It was delicious! ;p
Four Stitches?? That’s all I need?? Just Four Stitches?? 
…and yes, I will most certainly use my favorite knife again.
ADignorantium 